Small print, plain words
Privacy & safety
The short version: this website does not collect anything about anybody. Here is the long version, written so you do not need a lawyer to read it.
What we collect
Nothing. There is no sign-up, no account, no login, no newsletter, no contact form, no comments and no chat anywhere on this site. We do not ask for a name, an email address, an age or a location, from a child or from an adult.
Cookies and tracking
This site sets no cookies. There is no analytics package, no advertising pixel, no social media tracker and no session storage. Nothing about your visit is recorded in your browser or sent anywhere. That is also why there is no cookie banner — there is nothing to consent to.
Third parties
The site loads its typefaces from Google Fonts, which means your browser makes a request to fonts.googleapis.com and fonts.gstatic.com to fetch them. That is the only request this site makes to anyone other than our own server. All video and imagery is served directly from us. There are no embedded players, no iframes and no social widgets.
Children under 13
This site is intended to be safe for children and is designed on the assumption that children will visit it. Because we collect no personal information whatsoever, there is nothing to obtain parental consent for under the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) or the UK and EU equivalents. If we ever add a feature that would collect anything, this page will be updated first and the feature will sit behind the Grown-Ups section.
Links that leave this site
Outbound links are confined to the Grown-Ups area and the footer — an email address, and eventually our YouTube channel. There are no outbound links in the Characters, World or Watch sections, so a child exploring on their own stays on this site.
On YouTube
When the show publishes, every video will be marked Made for Kids on YouTube. That setting is not cosmetic: it disables comments, disables personalised advertising, and turns off features such as notifications and saving to playlists. We will not run paid product placement or endorsement in any episode, which would remove the video from the YouTube Kids app and is not the business we are in.
Content standards
No sensational or clickbait titles and thumbnails. No pranks, no humiliation, no manufactured distress. Peril is resolved within the episode. Vincent is a bumbler and never a genuine threat. Our thumbnails will show what is actually in the video.
Questions
Write to hello@hambalonius.com and a human will answer.
Last updated: August 2026. If this page changes materially, the date changes with it.